Clash of the Titans -- Review

Do you remember that gag your friends used to play about "running through a forest"? The one where they'd flail their hands around in front of your face until "you run into a tree" and then they'd bopped you on the head.  Well, I just spent just under 2 hours in a film where I felt like I was just being played with before running head first into NOTHING.  I know that 3D is supposed to be the IN thing because it's "so cool", but I'm sick of having to feel like I can't see straight when I'm paying upwards of $18+ per 3D film.  And now,  with the 24% increase in ticket rates I'm sorry to say, that it is becoming less and less likely that I would willingly go to another 3D film.

This weekend we are being hit with the Clash of the Titans in 3D and but, I have to tell you, I have never felt so confused while watching such a simple story line.  This remake to the 1981 classic has so much happening on screen that I felt like I walked out of the theater cross-eyed.  With the combination of 3D, visual effects, complicated battle sequences, and the outrageous number of monsters constantly flying at the screen I could barely keep track of what was happening.  The picture looked like one big blur and about half way through the film I forfeited  the 3D glasses and chanced watching the film without their aid and discovered, it really made no difference in the viewing and interpretation of what was happen and to who.

Clash of the Titans was cram packed with so much action that it did not leave time for much else.  The story even left me scratching my head as there was no introduction to any of the character other than Perseus, Zeus or Hades.  Regardless of how much I love Ralph Fiennes, I found his portrayal of Hades almost too “Darth Vader”  like and the only thing that would have completely thrown the film would have been Perseus, I am your father" line spouted by Zeus.  Liam Neeson's portrayal of Zeus was strong, and "shiny", which reminded me of the sparkling vampires.   There was just too much going on in front of me (and I don’t mean those sitting in front of me) that I could not help but be distracted.  The film, although action packed which  normally what I'm looking for in a film, this one left me wanting a stop button with no repeat, since I couldn’t bear to see it again. 

For me, Clash of the Titans is an adventure ride I'd rather they had stopped the ride so I could have gotten off.  This film was a definite unnecessary remake to a classic that may be out dated but a much more enjoyable film to watch.  I rate this 3D a epic fail.  Maybe an attempt at the 2D version will allow me to rate the film.  With the jumpy camera and unfocused picture, motion sickness is the only thing that I can  register as the film achievement.  So barf to Clash of the Titans and please don’t regurgitate it and make it into a 4D film next go around.